bottom lines

Our churches too often confuse faithfulness with numerical size, social influence, and 'coolness'. We are like small seeds who want instantly to become tall redwoods. We need to gain clarity about what it meansfor us to be faithful--a hard thing to do in a culture ruled by the bottom line.

confidence

from 1 Corinthians 10 in The Message:
Don’t be so naïve and self-confident. You’re not exempt. You could fall flat on your face as easily as anyone else. Forget about self-confidence; it’s useless. Cultivate God-confidence.

As I was reading this I remembered something Dallas Willard said about saints being the ones who consume the most grace. I think he said something like ‘Grace becomes like air.’ Anyway, I made the connection that we can get to feeling pretty good about ourselves and how much progress we’ve made in this following Jesus.

We get to a point where we think we can coast or ‘ride the wave’ of our progress. But that is precisely the moment when we forget where our confidence is supposed to lie. To return to Dallas’ image of breathing, it’s like we look at ourselves and think, “I’ve come pretty far in learning how to breath…I think I’ll take a break for a little while.” It’s nonsense!

Every day we (I) need to wake up and decide to be consumers of grace. To open our hearts before we open our eyes and decide to live, not in self-confidence (“I can do better today”), but in God-confidence (“Deliver me from the evil one”).

I thought I had this stuff figured out already. It’s nice to know I still have a lot to learn. It’s nice to wake up from my naïve self-confidence. It’s nice to see God is always bigger than we think.

transactions

I have recently become aware of the extent to which I relate primarily in transactional ways. This tells me that I am conditioned as a consumer--a fact that I do not like--and that it has shaped the way I relate to people. When we relate transactionally, we see other people only for how we might benefit from the relationship. For me this has usually meant that I call people only when I need something from them. This is not loving, it is taking. The nature of love is to share--to give. So I am identifying ways to counteract my consumer conditioning.

One way in which I am trying to learn how to love others is to call them with no agenda--simply to listen to them. If I am really intentional, I will actively tell them why I appreciate them. This really sounds silly, but think of how much of our conversations are driven by an agenda to acquire something or another--to take. I am tired of taking. There is no end to it, no satisfaction...just the next transaction.

I don't think I am alone.

maturity

I know a young man who is pretty smart. He has recently started using big words in his vocabulary. Big words like epistimology and existentially and stuff like that. What usually accompanies these words are attitudes like arrogance, impatience, and self-righteousness. Knowing big words and big ideas does not mean a person's knowledge is mature. Maturity of knowledge will come when the person can speak of their big ideas with big or little words--and with humility, patience, and respect for others.

sameness

To be conformed means that something is presently 'out of form'. It also means to be brought into sameness with something else. I recently wrote about the importance of living out our uniqueness. I still think that that is important, but I think that it must come underneath or alongside sameness. To submit to being formed in the shape of someone else--specifically for me, in the likeness of Jesus--requires a death--many deaths, in fact. But it also requires new life to be born. What must die first are my ideas about determining my own uniqueness--my self-rule and self-determination.
It is strange that in a culture so hell-bent on self-determination and autonomy, there is a sickening homogenization. Very few people today place themselves under the direction of another who will tell them what to do and lead them into places they would rather not go. The irony is that even this 'autonomy' is an illusion.
Wouldn't it be strange that the only way to truly be unique is to give up on the srive to be unique? If the only way to be different was to be formed in the likeness of someone else? If the only way to find your life was to lay it down?

unnecessary

I'm told that when you retire, you realize that you are no longer necessary. For some people, this is devastating, but it is also a possibility for liberation. For when we realize we are unnecessary, we also realize that this has always been the case. None of us is necessary. The sooner we embrace this, the sooner we can begin to understand the fact that we are a gift, and the sooner we realize that, the sooner we can begin to act as a gift--to give ourselves to others, not in some 'relevant' way but in the authentic and unique way that is who we are--not what others want us to be for them.